Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always wondered what it would feel like to explore the world on your own. For me, solo traveling had always been for brave adults who obviously had their life all figured out.
As I grew up, the curiosity remained. Thanks to the ever growing solo travel content on social media, it made us believe that solo traveling was supposed to be glamorous, exciting, thrilling. You’re supposed to meet so many new friends that would last a lifetime.
But do you really?
By a turn of fate, I end up on a solo “trip” (student exchange) for a month, and without even realizing it, I was embarking on my first ever solo travel journey.
I am towards the end of my exchange month now and this month has been a whirlwind of highs and lows, and I have a much more realistic insight on solo traveling than ever. Here is what I learned, the reality of solo traveling:
it is incredibly lonely
Sure, solo adventures can be fun for a few days. But we always overestimate our ability to be alone until we’re actually left on our own for a long period of time. A week, two weeks…a month.
Then you start wishing you had someone there with you to share your joy, to talk to over meals, to watch the sunset with.
The reality of solo traveling is that it can be incredibly lonely.
My first week in Seoul, I felt terribly alone. I realized that all the alone time I enjoyed was maybe for one afternoon, or a day at most. Being alone is a great way to recharge, but after you’re done recharging, you always find your way back to people.
Exploring alone and eating every meal by myself for so many days really got me craving human connection. And I came to this realization: what is the point of all the joys in life when there’s no one to share it with?
a time of self reflection…
Social media often depicts solo traveling as a fun life changing activity, and yes, it can be. But the reality of solo traveling is that you’re completely by yourself most of the times, and that gives you a lot of time to think… About life, about where you are in life right now, where you’ve been… and where you want to be. And throughout your journey you’ll learn so much about yourself, and at the end you’ll have grown so much as a person.
you learn your preferred way of traveling
Everyone prefers a different travel style, but often don’t realize it. Some people are more adventurous and prefer backpacking and staying at hostels, others prefer to travel more comfortably, taking ubers instead of public transport.
Knowing whichever travel style you prefer is key to having a memorable and enjoyable trip.
Throughout my exchange month, I learned that I really value comfort, like having a clean and spacious space to wind down after a day of exploring, and not being crammed on the subway with a bunch of people all the time, or having to look at my phone every 2 minutes to figure out the way to my next destination.
What’s even more important is that I learned what makes my trip truly memorable. Initially, I chose to do an exchange in Seoul because of the shopping, period. After almost a month here, I realized I’m really not a big shopper; consecutive shopping days makes me feel unproductive and like I haven’t done anything. Instead, I’m happiest when I’m cafe hopping, walking in parks, and watching sunsets.
So now I know the next time I plan a trip, to always add at least a day of sunset watching to my itinerary, and to give myself some chill time at cafes and parks, because these are what make my trips feel really worthy and memorable.
you’ll gain a lot of social skills
As an extremely awkward introvert, I have gone out of my comfort zone so many times during my one month exchange to talk to strangers and to try to make friends. And to my surprise, I have made so many new friends during this month. And the number of times I have gone up to strangers and asked them to take a photo of me…let’s not go there.
In fact, as I’m typing this at a cafe, I have just spent the last hour talking to two ladies from Macau who wanted to share their cakes with me.
My social skills are definitely a hundred times better than they were before this trip, and I’m so grateful for giving myself the chance to grow in this area.
Good news: you will make friends and memories that’ll last a lifetime
you get used to your own company
Even if it feels lonely sometimes, you really learn how to enjoy your own company after spending so much time by yourself. As much as I would love to have someone with me sometimes, I think this is a lesson I really needed to learn. To do various activities by myself without feeling awkward or out of place.
After all, you come and leave this world alone, so who else’s company to love more than your own?
but you’re never really alone
I have made so many beautiful friendships on my solo trip and these memories will stay with me for a life time. Truly, shared joy is double joy…Even when you’re supposedly on a solo trip, you’ll always be meeting new people, exchanging experiences and making new memories. So at the end of the day, you’re never really alone.
You may (or may not) realize solo traveling just isn’t for you
My first week of solo traveling honestly felt terrible. I wasn’t familiar with the environment, everything felt strange, and I missed my friends, family, and dogs terribly. As I’m nearing the end of my exchange month, I have slowly gotten used to life alone in Seoul, and even come to love it a little. The beautiful Autumn foliage, the never ending choice of aesthetic cafes, the hills, mountains, and buildings.
I’ve kinda gotten used to being alone.
However, as much as I have grown to enjoy this solo journey, I don’t really plan on doing this again. It’s kinda a been there done that for me now, and I’m so glad I had the chance to travel solo for an entire month. It’s been on my bucket list for the longest time, and now I can travel with my loved ones without ever having to wonder what it would feel like if I just fly off to another country by myself for an extended amount of time.
Remember…just because social media makes solo travel seem so glamorous doesn’t mean it’s for everyone. Never let anyone make you feel weird or strange for not enjoying something that’s overglorified.
Do you enjoy solo traveling? Why or why not?
Until next time,
Emi
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